Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Good friends are hard to find ...

I was so down yesterday. And my friends, near and far, without fail, were there for me. As I know they would. They consoled me, they encouraged me, they were there for me...and most important of all, they cheered me up. Ita, especially, with her brand of advice which were ladden with humour - were very effective in making me laugh (ketawa dalam tangisan is more appropriate to describe it!). Liz and Fend with their advice, which were laced with swear-word (hehehehe), scarcsm (not directed to me, of course) were very comforting indeed. My dear moi was also there for me, well i sort of just bursting into her room with my box of tissue, one look at me and she knew i wasn't ok. And Wan also called to ask if I am ok.....

I really appreciate your friendship, and your support....good friends are hard to find, and I am glad I have friends like you!

Monday, September 15, 2008

poisonous darts ...

I thought things are ok now. I thought it is all sorted, pending my "appointment" after Raya, of course. I thought I am free. And I thought, I got rid of the scumbag and all those heartaches, the misery, the uncertainties, and most of all the unpleasantness that often comes with IT. Today, a bombshell was dropped, poisonous darts that zeroed on my life...i was very contend, happy with my the way my life is turning, but that darts of poisons had turned my world upside down once again. The uncertainties were brought up (yet again) and with it comes the unpleasantness that left a really sour taste in my mouth. And without fails, it bring along tears, swearing, anger and a feeling of being utterly useless coz I can't control the situation.

Then I would start to question myself...have i been that bad that all these things are always coming back to bite me, am i that bad a person? I hope I am strong to overcome this. My friends seem to think that I am. Perhaps they are right, I am not so sure any more. I hope this is sorted without involving me - coz the implication is to great for me to bear. Am making a mental note to myself as I am typing this - NEVER EVER BE A FOOL AGAIN..DO NOT BE TOO TRUSTING!

Friday, September 12, 2008

If money is no object ...

I got my credit card statement yesterday and I was thinking when am i going to clear all those debt. I really want to clear it all off (if possible!) before my Bandung trip. So, that gives me roughly 3 months to do so - a virtually impossible mission I would say!

And it got me thinking - if money is no object...what would I do with my "newly acquired" purchasing power. If I am making a list, i reckon it would be endless! But would this unlimited flow of cash make me happy or happier than I am now? I would love to be happy, and not worry about finances. Who wouldn't?

There were times in my life, when money were so tight, that I really have to count coins just to makes ends meet. I even work two jobs! There were months when I didn't receive any salary coz it was yet to be approved (I was working part-time then). but the rent, the car loan, the cost of fuel still have to be paid. I had to resort to borrowing money from my pensioner dad (imagine how sad and small this makes me feel!) and a dear friend (whom I just known less than a year then! Thanks Moi...). Those were the lean time and thank God I got through it all ...

Back to the rhetoric question: what would I do if I have unlimited money? First of all, I would say I clear all my debts - mortgage, car loan, study loan etc. I'll definitely pay my brother and sister's loans as well...and then I'll fly my friends and assorted handbags for a trip round the worlds - first class accommodation all the way! On second thought, I'll buy my own plane so that we have more space and privacy:-))

And Moi Lina, Iris, Moi Next Door, amber ann and ian - we'll go anywhere in the world except Alaska ok...I am sure by then, I'll have enough money to bribe somebody to send you know who to Alaska! And we'll leave her there for good :-)

If only these were true! But then again, after what I saw during my site visit yesterday - I am grateful for what I have. Sometimes we just need to be reminded how lucky we are...to know that you have family and friends who are there for you - through thick and thin- are comforting. so, my dear friends, thank you for being there for me...and yes, if I have unlimited cash, I would definitely shower you guys with gifts and take you with me for holidays anywhere you want...but remember, this is only an angan2 mat jenin!

Monday, September 8, 2008

direct translations + idiotic answers = migrain

I was marking my students' mid-term exam over the weekend. Needless to say, i end up with migrain -from trying to dechiper what they were trying to express - and to read really terrible handwritings. But when push comes to shove, I don't mind bad handwriting. Trying to understand what they are writing about is harder - especially when their command of the language is not up to the standard. Personally, I think the University is already quite lenient that they are allowed to write their answers either in BM or English. What really made me cranky is that they can't even write in ONE language properly...i remembered a time when we were not given any choice in this matter when it comes to answering exam questions. And one would try the hardest to improve on that particular language!

This is, in my opinion, the problem of today's student population - they are always mixing up their languages, and consequently, fall under the trap of "direct translation". I hated this type of thing..And another common occurrence in those exam scripts are the use of short-form. This is the influence of technological advancement and globalization. (Who says technology always bring out the best in every situation???? helloooooooo have you tried to read student's essay filled with short forms, direct translation and mixed languages????) They texted so much that when it comes to exams, they did the same (perhaps not deliberately or not realizing that they are doing so)!

I only finished marking a set of 44 papers over the weekend...and tonight I am going to start on my other set. This one has 156 students.....i can feel the migrain coming already!