poisonous darts ...

I thought things are ok now. I thought it is all sorted, pending my "appointment" after Raya, of course. I thought I am free. And I thought, I got rid of the scumbag and all those heartaches, the misery, the uncertainties, and most of all the unpleasantness that often comes with IT. Today, a bombshell was dropped, poisonous darts that zeroed on my life...i was very contend, happy with my the way my life is turning, but that darts of poisons had turned my world upside down once again. The uncertainties were brought up (yet again) and with it comes the unpleasantness that left a really sour taste in my mouth. And without fails, it bring along tears, swearing, anger and a feeling of being utterly useless coz I can't control the situation.

Then I would start to question myself...have i been that bad that all these things are always coming back to bite me, am i that bad a person? I hope I am strong to overcome this. My friends seem to think that I am. Perhaps they are right, I am not so sure any more. I hope this is sorted without involving me - coz the implication is to great for me to bear. Am making a mental note to myself as I am typing this - NEVER EVER BE A FOOL AGAIN..DO NOT BE TOO TRUSTING!